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07 January 2009 @ 11:05 pm
A Pirates Life for Me  
Title: A Pirates Life for Me
Rating: PG
Characters: Super Junior/ (M), DBSK
Genre: Humor
Note: Written for miracle______'s Secret Santa of 2008. It wasn't a one shot, which is epic fail and I didn't finish it, which was epic fail. And I just feel like epic fail.

The sun beat down on the small row boat. Heechul lay, sprawled across the wooden planks, a jar tucked safely between his arm and side. Why he had this jar, was an interesting story. Some random guy named Captain Jack, whom he had the privilege of meeting previously on a deserted island had given it to him, telling him that it was somehow important. How a jar of dirt was important was beyond Heechul. However, he still decided to keep it because possessions were one thing Heechul enjoyed possessing, and when he had the chance to posses these possessions he jumped on it.

He rolled over trying to find a more comfortable position in the tiny boat, but lost interest when he heard a familiar squawk. Propping himself up slightly he noticed a somewhat large white bird preening itself happily on the edge of the boat. Heechul attempted to lift himself up more, but when he tried the boat rocked, angering the seagull.

“Oi!” Heechul called at the bird.

The bird lifted its head and glanced at Heechul, then went back to preening its wings.

“Oi, birdy!” Heechul tried again waving his hand at the bird, trying not to rock the boat again. There still was no response from the animal and Heechul sighed.

“What do you want from me then, hm?” Heechul asked annoyed, “Do you want food? Well, guess what, don’t got any. Not even for me. So you can just fly away now, or hop your way over here.”

The bird still didn’t make any movements to confirm that it actually understood what he was saying.

“You’re such a pain you know that?” Heechul pouted. “Dumb, lazy bird…”

The bird raised its head again and blinked a few times.

“Wanna name?” Heechul asked sarcastically, “Cuz there’s a few I would be more then happy to call you.”
The bird squawked at Heechul.

“You like to torture me don’t you?” Heechul asked it, eyes glaring from underneath the brim of his hat. “You like to sit here day after day and laugh at me from across the boat, don’t you?”

The bird tilted its head at Heechul, appearing almost as if it were confused.

“I knew it! I’ve figured you out haven’t I?” Heechul laughed nervously to himself, “Why the hell am I talking to a bird again?”

He buried his head in his hands and quite melodramatically yelled, “I’m going insane, aren’t I?”

He heard another squawk from the bird, and Heechul resumed his death glare. “I wasn’t talking to you!”

Sighing, Heechul let himself fall back against the bottom of the boat, his view only containing the soft clear blue of the sky. He shut his eyes, allowing the sun to once again cover his body. It was hot out, like always, but Heechul enjoyed it.

Slowly however, the heat was replaced with a soft cool breeze, and the sky seemed to darken beneath Heechul’s eyelids. Opening them a slit, he was dreading the chance of being met with a storm. Instead, there was a giant ship looming over his small boat; Its masts and sapphire blue sails seeming as if they reached the sky itself. His attention quickly turned to the flag flowing majestically in the breeze. Heechul smirked.



“Hey, hey, hey!” Heechul shouted, “Watch the coat!”

He was roughly tossed onto the deck of the ship, crewman laughing and snickering as he hit the boards. Someone stole his hat, which angered Heechul even more then he already was. Running a hand through his fiery red hair he stood, and brushed off his jacket, right before his hands were grabbed and forced behind him.

“Don’t you dare touch me or I’ll—,“ Heechul began before he was rudely interrupted by a low melodic laugh.

“Or you’ll what?” The man, who belonged to this mesmerizing laugh, strode toward Heechul. His boots thumping their way across the boards, stopping directly in front of him, “What will you do?”

Heechul stared into the man’s eyes, and raised an eyebrow before bursting into loud obnoxious coughs. “Jeeeeeze! Don’t you know what a Tic Tac is?” Heechul spluttered.

This seemed to anger the man, whom Heechul now deducted was in fact the Captain of the ship. His large hat with the fluffy feather seemed to give it away. Also the attitude of, ‘I’m superior worship me’ helped bring him to this conclusion.

“Um, would it be too much to ask,” Heechul inquired, “If you could, um, get mister muscle man to let me go?”

“And why,” The Captain asked, “on God’s green earth would I want to do such a thing like that?”

Heechul laughed, wincing when the hold on his wrists tightened, “Well, you see, your ship here…I have to say I’ve never ever heard of it.” There was mumbling throughout the crew as Heechul continued, “So, if you would be so kind as to enlighten me on what you call this floating piece of wood, I would be delighted.”

The captain folded his arms across his chest, the brim of his hat shading his eyes from view. “It’s called the Hangbok, and if you have any thoughts of living another day, you would address me as Captain Yesung.”

“Alrighty Captain,” Heechul smirked and tried to hold down his laughter, “Where did you possibly find,” snicker, “Such a name,” giggle, “as Hangbok?”

“All right!” Yesung shouted stomping his foot, “That’s it! Throw him in the brig with that pompous navy man we found earlier!”

Heechul was pushed along, too weak from laughing to hard to even protest or fight back. “See ya later, Captain.”


“Where did he come from?” Yehsung mumbled to himself while massaging his temple.

“I dunno, Captain. But, I don’t like him at all. Nope. Not at all.” The blond haired crew member stated, carefully pulling a needle through his bunny’s torn ear.

Yesung sighed propping his feet up on his desk, and crossing his arms, deep in thought. “Sungmin?”

“Hm? Yes, Captain?” Sungmin’s big brown eyes opened, like he’d been caught doing something wrong. He dropped the needle in his hand, gasping as it hit the floor.

“I want you to watch the two in the brig…and send Kangin up to talk with me.” Yesung said it as if he were lacing something together in his mind, not even noticing the troubled Sungmin feeling the ground in search of his sewing tool.

“Uh, sure thing, Captain!” Sungmin nodded carefully picking up the thin silver needle. Nodding again at the captain he waved and skipped out the door of the captain’s cabin.

Yesung took off his hat, tossing it onto his desk, papers fluttering to the floor. He needed to come up with a plan. Something that would make them great. Make them the most feared pirates of the waters. Make people tremble and shake whenever they heard the name the Hangbok.


“I can’t even believe they named this thing the Hangbok!” Heechul cackled, still laughing, curled up on the floor of the brig, gasping for breath. “I can’t believe it! What pirate in their right mind would name their ship such a thing?!”

“Um,” The man in the corner of the cell with Heechul raised an eyebrow, “are you alright?”

“It’s hysterical!”

“I think ‘I am hysterical’ would be a better term for you to use there.”
Heechul grabbed onto the bars of the cell and pulled himself up into a sitting position. After taking a few deep breaths he glanced over at his cell mate and grinned. “You look like a pompous navy man. Just like the captain said.”

“I would take that as a compliment, if it weren’t coming from you. Pirate.”
Heechul stood and bowed, “The pleasure is mine.”

There was silence.

“So, my pompous navy man, what is thy name?” Heechul asked sitting and scooting closer toward him.

“Why would I give it to you?” The dark haired man asked, crossing his arms.

Heechul shrugged, “I don’t know. Why would you?”

“That’s why I’m asking you.” He replied with a look of confusion on his face.

“So you don’t know why you’re not telling me your name, because you don’t want me to not, not know your name, so your not telling me.”


“You had no idea what I just said, did you?” Heechul laughed and clapped his hands together.

“I did, too!”

“If you did then give me your name.”


“Then you didn’t know what I said, and you didn’t understand it at all.”

“But, I did!”

“Then prove it, by telling me your name.”





“What is it with birds?”

“Tell me your name!”




“You’ve already said that.”


“What is it?!”

“What is what?”

“Your name!”

“I’m not going to tell you!”

“Shut up in there, will ya?” The muscle man yelled from the other side of the room.

“What’s your name?” Heechul whispered.

“I said I wasn’t going to tell you.”

“Please!” Heechul’s eyes went wide.

“Nope, not happening.”

“You’re a jerk.”

“No, I’m pompous, not a jerk.”

“Aren’t they synonyms?”


“Your name should be a synonym for—“

“I said be quiet!” Muscle man yelled again.

“What’s your name?!” Heechul yelled back.

“None of your business.”

“What the hell is wrong with you people!” Heechul shouted standing and grabbing the bars. “I just want to know your names!”

“You haven’t told us yours.” The navy man said.

“Ah! Someone’s a genius,” Heechul stated flatly.

The navy man glared.

“For your information, I don’t think you want to know.”

“Why wouldn’t I.”

“If I told you, then I would have to kill you.”

“Yeah, okay.”

“I don’t think that would be much of a loss, now that I think about it.”


“No problem.”

“So, what’s your name?”

“Captain Kim Heechul.”

There was silence in the brig. It hung, intense and heavy on them all. Then there was a cough.

“I’ve never heard of you.”

Heechul stuttered trying to come up with something to say. “Wh-What do you mean, haven’t heard of me?”

“It means that your name has never reached mine ears.”

“Alright smart—“

“Hey! You two!”

Heechul and his pompous cell mate turned toward the man who spoke, putting a stop to their quarrelling.

“Shut up or I’ll cut out your insides and feed it to the seagulls!”

“Kangin?” A soft whisper echoed through the brig, “Yesung wants to see you.”

“Alright now,” More shouting, “Keep quiet for Sungmin, or I’ll torture you to death!”

“Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do anyway?”

“Empty threats aren’t very threatening,” Heechul yelled back, “Especially from you, Kangin!”


“Yes, Captain?” Kangin asked entering the cabin.

Yesung sighed, “Did you find out any information on either prisoner?”

“The Pompous navy man won’t give his name at all, and the raggy hobo of a pirate’s name is Kim Heechul.”

Yesung’s head shot up. “Kim Heechul?”

Kangin looked confused, “Um, yes, Kim Heechul.”

Yesung looked worried for a second and then thoughtful.

“Are you okay captain?” Kangin asked, worried.

“Maybe we could…no…wait! He could…yes…yes he could. No…that wouldn’t…yes.”

Kangin looked extremely confused. “Captain?”

“I need to talk to him.” Yesung decided standing up. “We have a deal to make.”

“Yes, Captain.”


The door of the brig swung open.

“…and then you see, they made me their chief.” Heechul finished with a flourish of his wrist. A wide eyed Sungmin sat, intent on listening to the story.

“So, they—“ Heechul was about to continue before he was rudely interrupted.

“Sungmin, get away from him.”

Sungmin obeyed. He stood next to Yesung head bowed almost ashamed.

“Hey!” Heechul rose and clasped onto the bars, “What’s so wrong with being near me?”

Yesung strode towards the cell, his long jacket flowing behind him. He looked down at Heechul, with his dark eyes, “Are you Kim Heechul?”

“Yeah.” Heechul stated.

“Are you lying? You can just imagine what we do to liars here.”

“Um, yeah.” Heechul said chuckling, “I bet your favorite form of torture here is tickling people to death. I’m so very afraid!” Heechul stepped back into the cell, dodging Yesung outstretched arm to strangle him. “Oi! If we’re going to have that kind of behavior here on this ship, you must start with Mr. Pompous Navy Man here!”

“Who do you think you are?” Yesung asked exasperated.

It was Heechul’s turn to be exasperated, “I’m Captain Kim Heechul. Who else would I be?!”

“You don’t own this ship. I am the captain of this ship.” Yesung sternly stated.

“Well,” Heechul approached the bars again, his nose only inches away from Yehsung’s, “You haven’t been running it very well, Captain.”

Yesung glared and through clenched teeth growled, “Fine, then.”

He stepped away from Heechul, and strode over to Kangin and Sungmin.

Heechul leaned against the wall of the cell and crossed his arms. Sighing he examined his nails and ran a hand through his hair.

Yesung seemed to be consulting with them. Hushed whispers got lauder at certain points and all Heechul could make out was ‘Heechul,’ ‘yes’ and ‘no,’

Finally Yesung returned, his facial expression more composed and calmer then before. “I have a proposition for you,” He hesitated for a moment and then said, “Captain Kim Heechul.”

“Yes?” Heechul asked hands on his hips, an expectant expression on his face.

“Would you be willing,” Yesung continued, “To help me and my crew in becoming the most feared pirates of these waters?”

Heechul’s eyebrows rose, “You mean, more feared then The Dread Pirate Henry, or The Rising Gods of the East?”
Yesung nodded.

“You ask a lot my friend.” Heechul sighed and shook his head. Clapping his hands together Heechul smirked,

“What do I get out of this deal?”

Yesung hesitated and looked over at Kangin and Sungmin. They nodded at him urging him along. “We will give you your freedom once we’ve reached this status on the seas.”

Heechul laughed. “That’s it? You think I can’t escape on my own? I don’t need you guys to help me get off this boat—“

“Ship!” Yesung corrected him.

“Whatever this piece of tree is, you forget that I am Kim Heechul.”

Yesung glared, “Then what would you like as your reward for helping us?”

“Now we’re talking,” Heechul grinned tapping his chin as he thought. “Being out of this cell would be the first thing…”

“I would like to be out of here, too!” The navy man complained.

“Oh yes, I want to know his name, too.” Heechul pointed at his cell mate. “Also, I want control over this ship.”

Yesung protested, “No! I am captain of this ship!”

“Like I’ve stated before, you’re not a very good one, and you need to learn from the best.” Heechul stated, shrugging.

“Fine…” Yesung growled, “Anything else Captain Heechul?”

“Hmm…may I meet my crew now?”

Yesung reached into his pocket and pulled out the keys, dangling them in front of the bars barely out of reach. “How do I know you won’t run after I let you out?”

Heechul laughed, “I don’t have anything better to do. You think I would give this up to float around the ocean in my row boat again?”

Yesung’s glare softened and he chuckled, “I guess not.”


“All hands on deck!” Yesung growled as he stomped up the steps, a perky Heechul following behind him.

“On deck you dirty buckets of scum!” Heechul shouted stomping on the floor boards, “My grandmother can walk faster then you pieces of filth can run!”

Slowly, to Heechul’s dislike, the crew filed on deck and stood looking confused at their former captain.

“Get into a line, now.” Heechul pointed giving directions. When none of them moved he shouted, “I said NOW, and if that doesn’t happen I’ll throw all of you off the plank and feed you to the crocodiles!”

“Um, Heechul.” Yesung whispered to Heechul, “There aren’t any crocodiles in the ocean.”

“Ever heard of Peter Pan?” Heechul said. Yesung stayed silent. “Thought so.”

“Listen to Heechul!” Yesung shouted.

The crew did as they were told, getting more confused by the second. Everyone finally was in a nice line, down the deck, facial expressions reading dislike and confusion.

“Alright.” Heechul shouted hands clasped behind his back as he paced up and down the line of crewman. “I would like to inform you all that I will be your new captain here on…” Heechul hesitated and snickered, “the Hangbok.”

There was a sudden burst of loud shouts and protests.

“Quiet down!” Yesung shouted, “He’s not lying. He’s your new captain show some respect!”

The yelling died down and Heechul continued. “Now, as my crew I would like to know all of your fearsome pirate names. Starting with…” Heechul scanned the line and pointed at a man that was almost his height, “You. What is your name?”

The man raised an eyebrow and tossed his bangs to the side lazily, “Jungsu, and don’t forget it.”

“Okay then, Jungsu, what is your job on this ship?”

“I’m a tattoo artist,” Jungsu said flipping his hair once again and pulling up the sleeve of his shirt to reveal his arm coated in design after design. “You want one? Just come to me; anything, anywhere, anytime.”

Heechul nodded, “I’ll think about it. Next!”

He pointed at Kangin, “What is your job on this ship?”

Kangin cracked his knuckles. “To make sure the captain is protected at all times.”

“My own personal body guard?” Heechul sounded pleased.

“No.” Kangin stated flatly, “Yesung’s body guard.” Yesung elbowed Kangin in the side and muttered something under his breath. Then Kangin added begrudgingly “and yours, Captain Heechul.”

“Okay then, next!”

“I’m Sungmin.”
Heechul paused and looked him up and down. “Um…” Heechul turned to Yesung and whispered under his breath, “Is this one a eun—“

“Don’t even say it,” Sungmin said only inches away from Heechul, glinting silver pressed against his neck.

“Sungmin, it’s okay!” Yesung tried to reassure him, “He didn’t mean it!”

“I am NOT a pansy, or girl, or whatever other silly nonsensical term you try to come up with!” Sungmin defended, only slightly lifting his knife from Heechul’s neck.

Kangin gently pulled Sungmin away from Heechul, until he was back in line.

Heechul blinked, trying to get over the sudden shock of it all. “And what is your job on this ship?”

“I’m the best,” Sungmin said, arms crossed.

“The best…what?” Heechul asked, like he was missing something.

Sungmin stroked the metal of his knife and looked up at Heechul and he didn’t question any further.

“Next!” Heechul yelled.

“You have a very dark future ahead of you…by the way.”

Heechul stopped, “What?”

“You have a very dark future.”

“And your name is?”

“Shindong, or Dough Boy. Local fortune teller; I tell your fortune free of charge.”

“Yeah…” Heechul blinked, “What’s in his future then.” Heechul pointed to Yesung.

“A long life of sunshine and happiness awaits him.” Shindong smiled.


“It’s Siwon.”

“Okay then…Siwon.” Heechul said feeling slightly intimidated by his height, and half tattooed abdomen. “Is that Jungsu’s?” Heechul asked pointing to one tattoo beneath his belly button.

“Oh you mean, ‘Carpe Diem’?” Siwon asked, smirking, “Yeah, those are Jungsu’s alright.”

“Those?” Heechul asked, “I only see one.”

“Don’t even worry about it.” Siwon said.

Heechul was getting a little nervous, now that he actually met the crew. It was a little unnerving how half of them looked inexperienced and probably didn’t know the difference between the helm and the mast.

“Last, but not least…or are you the least?” Heechul asked pointing at the last crew member in line.

“The name’s Hyukjae.”

“What’s your job on this ship?”

“I don’t know…whatever Yesung tells me to do, I do it.” Hyukjae shrugged and crossed his arms.

“Perfect. Okay then!” Heechul announced taking more of a center stage in front of everyone. “I like to tell you all that after I am done with you, no pirate ever in their right mind will even dare to touch this ship. We will be the most feared pirates on these waters. Other pirates will wish they could be as awesome as us….any questions?”

“Um…yeah.” Sungmin asked raising his hand slightly, “When do we get to kick you off?”


“Yoho, yoho, a pirate’s liiiiiiiiiife fo meeeeeeeee!” Donghae danced across the deck of the ship, white sails billowing above him. “Cuz’ I can’t stop thinkin’ bout cha giiiiiirl!”


He turned around wide eyed, “huh?”

“Can you please keep it down a bit?” Henry asked, sitting on the steps of the ship leading to the helm. “I’m trying to calculate this but I’m having some slight issues.”

“Sorry, about that.” Donghae laughed and sat himself down right next to Henry. “Why don’t you get Zhoumi to help you?”

Henry sighed, “He’s busy adding up all of our income…I don’t want to bother him with a trivial matter like this.”

“Ah…” Donghae leaned back, his hands behind his head, and stared at the sky.

“The sky is beautiful isn’t it?” Henry asked putting down his pencil and looking at the sky as well.

“Yeah…hey, that cloud looks like a fish!” Donghae shouted excitedly shocking Henry a bit.

“What’s all the commotion over here?” a tall muscular crew member asked striding over, looking amused.

“Hey, Hankyung!” Donghae said, waving. “Look at that cloud!”

Hankyung looked up shading his eyes from the sun, “which one?”

“The one that looks like a fish.” Donghae continued to describe it.

“Yeah, what about it?” Hankyung asked.

“Doesn’t it look like a fish?” Donghae asked searching for confirmation that he wasn’t just imagining it.

“Of course it does,” Hankyung said, “How else do you think I was able to find it.”

Donghae laughed, “Oh yeah, you’re right.”

Hankyung glanced around the deck, and frowned. “Have any of you seen Kyuhyun or Ryeowook lately. I can’t seem to find them anywhere.”

“Last time I saw them…” Donghae said trying to remember, “They were down, redecorating our rooms.”

Henry looked up eyebrows raised, “They were what?”

“Redecorating.” Donghae said again.

“I thought they did that yesterday.” Henry said.

“Oh, they did.” Donghae said pulling himself up, “That’s why I said they were redecorating, today.”

“Where is Zhoum—“ Hankyung began but was cut off.

“I’m right here.” Zhoumi laughed trying to balance a stack of books and papers in his arms.

“Where have you been this whole time?” Hankyung asked curiously.

“He’s been calculating our income.” Henry said taking one of the books from Zhoumi and flipping through it.

“How’s it been going, Henry?” Zhoumi asked taking Donghae’s old seat next to him.

“Um…not so good.” Henry sighed and handed Zhoumi the book he had.

Zhoumi flipped through it, “What have you been having trouble with?”

Henry propped his head up with his hands and mumbled, “I dunno what to do.”

Donghae raised an eyebrow, “If we’re just going to talk about numbers, I think I’m going to go check on Ryeo and Kyuhyun…”

“Kay…sounds good.” Henry said, “Just make sure they’re doing what they’re supposed to.”


“Oh, and tell them not to use those ghastly pink ribbons…they don’t go with the whole pirate-y theme.”



“Woah, that looks so cool!” Sungmin said, examining Jungsu’s latest tattoo design.

“It looks cool,” Kangin said wincing, “But it hurts like hell.”

Jungsu laughed, “Don’t be such a baby!”

“I can’t believe you talked me into this…I can’t even see it…” Kangin sighed and attempted to stretch, but ended up wincing again.

“Hey!” Jungsu defended holding up his hands, “You’re the one that wanted it on your back. I said arm or stomach, but you wanted your back.”

Kangin hung his head, “I know, I know…”

“Maybe next time you should listen to me…yes?” Jungsu suggested, leaning against the side of the ship.

There was a small silence in between them; Kangin trying to get used to the whole tattoo thing, Sungmin thinking about whether he wanted one or not, and Jungsu just gazing at the horizon.

Heechul sauntered onto the deck, joining their little group. “So guys, what’s up?”

Sungmin glared at Heechul and took a step away from, trying to ignore he was even there.

“Just trying out a new tattoo design,” Jungsu replied tossing his bangs to the side.

“Ah…’Actions are more prection than words’…What’s that supposed to mean?” Heechul asked raising an eyebrow.”

“It means something in English.” Jungsu explained, pointing out the letters.

“Ah,” Heechul said, “That is cool!”

Jungsu smirked, and flipped his bangs, “You want one?”

“I’m still trying to decide,” Heechul said arms crossed.

“Take your time, I’m always free.”


There was a long gust of wind, tossing Jaejoong’s hair, making it dance in the breeze. He set his hat delicately on his head, the large plume now rocking back and forth. He carelessly meandered his way down the steps of the ship onto the deck, his coat flowing behind him.

“All hands on de—“

“Stop right there, Jae.” Micky said before Jaejoong could even finish.

“Time for the vote.” Xiah added, hands on his hips.

Yunho snatched the hat from Jae, “Yeah, you’ve been captain long enough.”

“Hey! That’s not fair!” Jae whined, pouting a little.

“It’s perfectly fair, and plausible.” Max added.

“Fine…” Jae sighed.

“Anyone in favor of Jae as captain, please raise your hand.” Yunho announced.

Jae eagerly raised his hand.

Yunho raised an eyebrow, ”Mmmmkay, anyone in favor of me as captain.”

Yunho raised his hand, and glanced around the circle.

With a sigh he continued, “Anyone in favor of Max.”

Max raised his hand.

“No WAY!” Jae whined stomping his foot, “This is totally and completely unfair, and unjust!”

“What?” Micky asked, “We haven’t voted yet.”

“That’s the problem!” Jae said fuming. “You’re going to vote for Xiah and then it’s going to be hell all over again!”

“You don’t know that until we vote!” Xiah argued.

“Okay, okay!” Yunho tried to calm everyone down. “All in favor of Xiah,”

Both Micky and Xiah raised their hands happily.

“I KNEW IT!” Jae growled.

“Hey, two votes for Xiah, he wins.” Yunho handed the hat to Xiah, begrudgingly.

“Now, all I’m ever going to hear every night is them in the captain’s cabin.” Jae continued to whine.

“Don’t even talk! You’re always in there with Yunho!” Xiah shot back.

Yunho looked over at Jae, jaw slightly open, “You said they wouldn’t find out!”

“Wow…” Max said, “Things I never wanted to know about my hyungs.”

“Shut up, Max.” Jae glared, “Go to your room.”

Max shrugged, “I’ll talk to you guys later…If you need me I’ll be in the hot tub.”

Xiah leaned over to Micky, “Do you think we should tell him…?”

“Um…I think he’ll find out on his own.” Micky whispered back.

“This is ridiculous!” Jae sighed, “I need a drink…want anything Yunho?”

“Rum?” Yunho replied.

Jaejoong left them, off to find some sort of drink that would help clear his mind.

“So, uh, Xiah.” Yunho said, rubbing the back of his head, “Could you please clean up after yourself next time.”

“Whatever.” Xiah shot back, “You never do such a thing!”

Yunho sighed, and shook his head.

Then Jae screamed so loud, Yunho swore anyone could have heard it for miles.



“What was that?” Henry asked raising an eyebrow.

“It sounded like someone was yelling…” Zhoumi replied.

Henry shrugged, “Whatever…So, we need to make another stop at Tortuga to see how well our shop is doing.”

“Yes,” Zhoumi agreed, “By the looks of it however, it’s doing pretty well so far. From our last stop there, our profit has increased.

“That’s good.” Henry smiled and stretched. “It’s fun being a pirate.”

Zhoumi laughed, “We haven’t done anything Pirate-ish lately though have we?”

Henry opened his mouth to say something but Zhoumi cut him off, “Yeah, that one ship we found, doesn’t count.”

“Hey, but we did take a prisoner.” Henry said, grinning. “We all got to use swords and it was all epic and exciting.”

“But, we did end up making him walk to plank,” Zhoumi laughed.

“Yo, I wasn’t going to make him, but he was just so annoying and pompous, we HAD to.” Henry defended himself,

“I thought I was going to shoot myself!”

“Agreed.” Zhoumi chuckled, “What was his name again?”

“I think it was something like…Kibum?” Henry tapped his chin, “Yeah, I think that was it…”

“Yeah, and the Royal Navy thinks they are ever going to catch us,” Zhoumi smirked, “Yeah right.”

“I am the Dread Pirate Henry,” Henry laughed.


“So, what’s the plan?” Yesung asked, clapping his hands together. He was ready to tackle anything. He just wanted to conquer.

“I dunno.” Heechul shrugged, sipping his wine glass, feet propped on the captain’s desk.

“What do you mean, you don’t know?” Yesung asked.

“I mean, I don’t know.” Heechul said, gulping down the rest of his drink, “I’m going to wing it.”

Yesung was shocked, “But you’re Kim Heechul.”

“Yeah…I know that, thanks for telling me.” Heechul set his glass down.

“But, but—“

“I wing everything I do.” Heechul said shrugging, “I never plan for anything.”

“This is ridiculous.” Yesung sighed, disappointed, “The ship is in the hands of an idiot.”

“Hey, hey, hey!” Heechul stood, “I may be a procrastinator, and lazy, but I’m not an idiot.”

Yesung raised an eyebrow, “Oh really?”

“Yeah, really.”

“Prove it.” Yesung challenged, arms crossed.

Heechul was taken back, “Why on earth do you need proof on this matter?”

“You don’t seem very intelligent, although I have heard stories of your ‘greatness’” Yesung said. “I just haven’t seen any.”

Heechul laughed, “Okay, then.” He made his way to the door, kicking it open and marched his way on deck.

“Get a boat ready!” He demanded.

Eunhyuk who had just been standing around, examining a fraying rope, jumped into action and started to get Heechul’s boat ready.

“What on earth are you doing?” Yesung asked, watching as now both Eunhyuk and Kangin lowered the boat into the water.

“I’m winging it.” Heechul said throwing himself over the edge of the ship and climbing down the ladder.

“What are we going to do without a captain?” Yesung asked.

“What do you think?” Heechul asked like it were obvious, because well, it was. “You’re the captain, stupid.”

Heechul dropped into the boat and looked up at Yesung shielding his eyes from the sun, “I’ll get back to you on what happens.”

“What is going to happen?” Yesung asked.

“I’m making you the most feared pirates in the entire ocean.”

Yesung was confused out of his mind.

“Don’t worry so much.” Heechul shouted, “Now where’s my jar of dirt?”


Jae leaned against the side of the ship and sighed. “Nothing exciting happens anymore.”

Yunho put a hand on his shoulder, “Yeah…ever since we became the Rising Gods of the East, no one even dares to fight us.”

“It’s not fair…” Jae complained. “I can’t stand just floating around on this ship forever pretending we’re pirates.”

“Well,” Yunho coughed and looked around, “We could…I mean since no one else is on deck…we…uh---“

Jae laughed, “Sorry, Yunho, I’m not in the mood.”

Yunho looked slightly hurt for a moment, but then got over it. “Okay, I’ll go make us some drinks.”

“Make sure they have the little umbrellas in them…oh, and bring up the chairs while you at it.” Jae ordered.

“Yes, sir…”

Jae once again assumed his position by the side of the ship. He sighed once again staring into the horizon. A small dark blob, a short distance off, caught his attention. Could that be…?

“Heechul!” Jae greeted him helping him out of his boat.

“This ship looks exactly as I left it.” Heechul said grinning.

“Nothing’s really changed much…our lives are still as boring as ever…”

“What? Boring?” Heechul asked, an eyebrow raised. “Well, my friend,” Heechul said wrapping his arm around Jaejoong’s shoulders, “I think I have some news that will make your lives slightly better.”

“What is this news?” Jae crossed his arms waiting.

Heechul stopped and tossed the jar of dirt in the air and catching it, “I need everyone else on deck.”

“What is this nonsense?” Yunho asked sipping from his wine glass, the little umbrella tickling his nose.

“Where is everyone else?” Heechul asked taking the glass from Yunho and chugging the rest.

With a slight frown, Yunho replied, “They’re coming.”

Heechul examined the small umbrella, and decided he approved of it. As Xiah and Micky decided to join their circle Heechul slid the umbrella behind his ear.

“Okay,” Heechul began, “I have come across another ship on these waters, and I have come to warn you.”

“Why do we need the warning?” Max scoffed, “You should be warning them about us.”

“Oh, right.” Heechul clapped his hands together, “That’s what I thought.”

There was a slight silence on the ship. Only the flapping of the sails could be heard as a chill went down everyone’s spine.

“I can’t even begin to describe the fearsomeness that is them.” Heechul said flipping his hair to the side. “I was only barely able to escape with my life!”

“That sounds terrible!” Xiah commented moving closer to Micky.

“They said they would let me live, only if I found the Rising Gods of the East and told them of their challenge.” Heechul paused for effect and scanned each of their faces. His plan was working.

“They challenge us?” Jae asked the spark of excitement shining in his eyes.

“You mean they want to fight us, like real pirates?” Micky asked, hugging Xiah tighter.

“I am afraid that is what has to happen.” Heechul said, sighing. “They want you and the Dread Pirate Henry.”

“Henry?” Max asked confused, “Why on earth would they want to fight Henry’s crew?”

“I told you!” Heechul said hopping onto the edge of the ship, holding onto the ropes for balance. His coat billowed behind him majestically. “They are ruthless and cruel. You guys need to keep your honor and fight them like the pirates you are. Prove to them that you rule this ocean! Let them not take away your title that you’ve kept for so long!”

Xiah raised his hand slowly.

“What?” Heechul asked.

“What if I don’t want to?”

Jae snatched the hat away from Xiah and placed it on his head, “We are going.”

“That isn’t fair!” Xiah complained.

“It’s completely fair,” Jae said, “We need a captain who will actually lead this ship.”

Heechul smirked. So it begins.


“I don’t know what to do…” Yesung hung his head.

“Captain this ship of course!” Sungmin said exasperated, “You led this ship before! Why is it so hard for you to lead it now?”

“I don’t…know.” Yesung sighed and laid his head down on his desk in despair.

“I can’t believe you! You’re giving up, just like that?” Sungmin asked.

There was no response from Yesung.

Sungmin sighed frustratingly and stomped out of the captain’s cabin slamming the door behind him.

Yesung picked his head up and glanced around the cabin, feeling depressed. He didn’t know what he was going to do about anything anymore. He looked at all the paper spread across the floor. One in particular stood out to him however because it was bright pink.

Leaning down he picked it up and examined the writing.

“Stop sitting on your lazy butt and get over to Tortuga!”

Yesung raised an eyebrow. Tortuga? What was the harm in doing that? He assumed the note came from Heechul, but how could be so sure…

He stood feeling a very slight new sense of purpose, and marched out of the Captain’s cabin.

“I WANT EVERYONE ON DECK!” He shouted. “Set the sails! We have a new destination!”

“Where to captain?” Eunhyuk inquired.

“To Tortuga.” Yesung said.

“Tortuga?” Sungmin asked.



“LAND HO!” Ryeowook announced pointing in the distance at a small smudge of land against the horizon.

Kyuhyun rushed to the side of the ship squinting his eyes, “Yup, there she is!”

“Tortuga, here we come!” Donghae danced happily across the deck as Henry and Zhoumi decided to join them.

“We are almost there, aren’t we?” Henry smiled and high fived Donghae as he slid past them.

“I can’t wait ‘til we get there!” Ryeowook sighed happily.

“Why?” Zhou Mi asked curiously.

“We ran out of decorations,” Kyuhyun answered for him.

Henry laughed, and Zhou Mi shook his head. Those two were ridiculous.


“Why Tortuga?” Jae asked, straightening the feather on his hat.

Heechul glanced over at Jae, and then looked back at the horizon, “They want to make sure all of the other pirates see.”

“See what?” Max asked leaning over to examine Heechul’s jar of dirt, which was sitting carelessly on a barrel.

Heechul eyed Max making sure he didn’t do anything unruly to his jar, “The battle, of course.”

Max reached out to poke the jar, but Heechul scooped it into his arms, hugging it protectively.

“This is ridiculous.” Xiah complained, “I don’t think there is any need at all for us to prove that we are the best.”

“Yeah,” Micky agreed, “I mean, we all know we are awesome, and all the other pirates seem to agree.”

“Except them.” Max added.

“Obviously,” Yunho said rolling his eyes.

“I don’t care what the rest of you think,” Jae stood, “We are going to fight this battle with honor, and we are going to prove that we own these waters and everyone else in it. Got that?”

“Tortuga!” Heechul shouted, pointing to the horizon.

“Where?” Xiah asked looking in every direction.

“Straight ahead!”


“So…what do we do now?” Eunhyuk asked scratching his head.

“I think that answer to that is…uh…Wait.” Shindong answered him.

“Oh great and powerful fortune teller, I really needed you to tell me that!” Eunhyuk sighed frustrated and stomped off to the other side of the ship.

“Yesung?” Sungmin inquired hands on his hips, “Why did we come here?”

“The note told me to.” Yesung answered glancing around the horizon.

Sungmin looked concerned, “The note?”

“Yeah…” Yesung noticed two dark blobs, both appearing to be ships. What was Heechul up to?

“Yesung?” Sungmin asked again. There was no response from him. “Yesung?!”

“Huh?” Yesung turned to face Sungmin, “What?”

“Are you really going to do everything Heechul is telling you?” Sungmin asked, “What if he’s trying to lead us to our death?”

“I don’t think he is.” Yesung replied, making his way to the front of the ship.

“But, you don’t know that!” Sungmin pushed on, following Yesung.

“I know I don’t.” Yesung said pulling out his spyglass and looking in the direction of the ships. “I just believe he’s telling the truth.”

Sungmin sighed, and decided to change the subject. “What’s that out there?”

The first ship looked closer then the other, but he couldn’t make out the flag just yet. It looked like another pirate ship. Yesung got a shiver down his spine. It couldn’t be….not them…could it? He squinted trying to make out the flag. It was red. That wasn’t good. It couldn’t be the Rising Gods of the East…Could it?

He pointed the spyglass in the direction of the other ship. Squinting he couldn’t really make out the flag of that ship either….it had a….

The spyglass crashed onto the deck, as Yesung’s skin got white.

“What is it, captain?” Sungmin asked rushing to Yesung’s side.

“It’s…It’s…The Rising Gods of the East…and…and…” Yesung stuttered.

Sungmin snatched the spyglass and looked through it himself.

“The Dread Pirate Henry.”


“Woah!” Henry, said, “There’s more traffic than normal today, isn’t there?”

“It looks like it.” Zhou Mi answered, “Our shop must be pretty popular.

“How much do you think we made?” Henry asked attempting to count in his head.

Zhou Mi laughed, “Probably more than last time.”

“Hey…” Donghae pointed at one of the ships in the distance. “Isn’t that The Rising Gods of the East?”

Hankyung squinted, “It looks like it.”

“Yay!” Donghae clapped, “I can’t wait to talk to Yunho…we haven’t seen each other in ages.”

“It’s like a little pirate reunion!” Ryeowook said happily.

Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Current Music: Fan- Epik High